Again i disappeared for a while, but this time, for something really worth it! I am back from Haj, not sure if i am happy about being back? it was such a lovely dream. Until today, I keep rolling around in bed dreaming of the crowds in Al Haram and camping in Al Mozdalifa and chattering with all the girls i met during my 1 week stay. It is such a blessing to be granted the opportunity to preform Haj early in my life, I am thankful to Allah…

I thought it would be such an exhausting experience, i prepared myself for the worse, yet, subhan Allah, everything seemed to turn out to our benefit, thanks to the prayers of the people in the group, and to the sincere efforts of Al Rayah team who did all they could to insure that we were on the right tracks. Like i said, despite the endless hours of being stuck in the buses and doing Tawaf and Sa3y along with millions and having no sleep whatsoever for a whole week, i only realized how exhausted i am when i came back home to Dubai and slept like a a big fat bear. I can’t remember the last time i actually fell asleep everytime i came near a bed or sofa >_< … I had my parents calling numerous times a day asking if i woke up lol

Anyhow, I’m still in a settling phase in my life.. I need to arrange my thoughts and priorities, I need to set solid goals and write them down right in front of my eyes. As typical humans, we tend to fear change and wear ourselves out worrying what would come of us after taking different choices in our lives. Sometimes the decisions are fully within our control, while at other times, there are other aspects affecting what we choose. It is the later that I fear the most, but I decided that I can handle it, and I can bring the best of it enshallah. I have great people in my life supporting me, who have showed that they will not let go no matter what, but there are also those that seem to slip away silently, not realizing that they are no longer willing to make any effort.. it is what hurts the most.

and so let me sneak away myself, i am nearly finished with book 2 of Harry Potter. I never really thought I’d enjoy the books as much as I do.